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How do I ask my friend to pay me back for the plane ticket I bought him?

I (23F) and my friend (29M) are going to a convention out of state later this year. When we were discussing plans, he said he’d have to wait until his next payday to buy his ticket. I offered to purchase it alongside mine so we could sit next to each other on the plane and he just pay me back (his payday was a week later). He accepted, and I purchased the tickets – they were about $200 each.

The problem is, it’s now been over a month and he still hasn’t paid me back. I’ve reminded him twice, and he’s apologized each time and assured he’d cashapp me. I just moved and I could really use that money back (not to mention he promised me he’d pay me back). At this point, I don’t know what to do. We’ve already planned this trip together, and we talk every day. I don’t want to nag him, but I’m really fucking annoyed he hasn’t paid me back. What do I do? I don’t want to ruin the friendship but I really need the money.

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  1. “Hey man, I really need you to pay me back for your plane ticket, immediately. It’s been a month and I feel thats a pretty fair grace period. I helped you out in your time of need so we could do this trip together, I need you to both make good on your word, and help me out in my time of need considering the move. $200 is a lot of money for me to just lose out on, especially right now, and I don’t want it to become a bigger issue in our friendship than it currently is. ” That’s how I would personally word it.

  2. He’s ruining the friendship by not paying you back , tell him if he doesn’t pay you back soon youre just going to resell the ticket for a refund and he’s going to have to buy one himself and you guys won’t get to sit next to each other. Do not go on the trip before he pays you back you might not see that money again

  3. “Hey, you know that $200 you owe me? I need it today.”

    It’s not nagging to ask for your money back. Stop asking. Start demanding. Your friendship is already damaged.

  4. Just say to him, “hey, I wanted you to get the cheaper ticket so I was willing to front the cost until your next paycheck to help you out, but I wasn’t expecting to be down $200 for so long. I either need you to pay me today, or I need to get a refund on the flight, because I have bills I need to pay now. Sorry man, it’s a rough life out here. Hope you understand”

  5. I’d explain to him that you need the money sooner rather than later and you gave it in the hopes you’d get that money back within the time frame he gave.

    For future reference, I wouldn’t lend out money that you can’t parted with. That way you don’t end up with situations like this.

  6. Nag him. Get angry. If the friendship gets ruined, it will not be your fault. He is *taking advantage* of your desire to not rock the boat. Is that a person you even *want* to be friends with anymore?

  7. As someone who went on a trip with a friend who had a lax financial outlook and didn’t really pay their share compared to myself, I’d be questioning the trip entirely if I were you. It’s annoying to travel with someone who lacks the same budget or thoughtfulness around money. They’re not likely to pay you back and if that’s the case I suspect they’d be leaning on you for support with other things like paying for food etc. Don’t fall into that dynamic. It’s not fair to you.

    Your friend is 6 years older and trying to avoid responsibility. You’ve asked twice. What more should you do? He’s irresponsible with money and the trip isn’t gonna be fun for you with this hanging over your head. Go solo if possible.

  8. You’re not “nagging” or ruining your friendship, he’s the one ruining it by not paying you back.

    He owes you money, you’re not being annoying by wanting that money back.

  9. Just say you really need the money right now and you can’t keep putting off getting repaid. If he gets upset because he said he would pay you back then that’s on him. It’s not like you’re talking about $5, $200 is a decent chunk of change.

  10. “Hey, I need you to pay me back for the flight today.”

    If the flights are cancellable, you may need to look into cancelling this trip if he won’t pay. Sounds like travel isn’t really in the budget rn anyways.

  11. If you don’t want to be annoying as hell yet, tell him how frustrated you are becoming, that you need the money and give him a deadline. If he doesn’t pay until then get annoying. It’s not you being a bad friend, it’s the consequence of his own behavior after a lot of leniency.

  12. At this point he won’t refund you the money. It’s best to bite the bullet and call up the airline company to cancel his ticket and I hope you got travel insurance so you get a refund on the ticket.

  13. Does the cashapp have a request funds feature? (I rarely use it so I do not remember.) If you combine that with the other suggestions, he cannot say he forgot, if the app is on his phone. It will notify him.

  14. Tell him you need the money immediately. Let this also be a lesson to you.

    1. never lend money you can’t afford to lose
    2. never volunteer to pay, unless you’re prepared for it to be a gift

    Sitting together on a plane isn’t worth the risk of ruining a friendship, and it’s also not worth the stress of being out $200 when you really needed that money for your own expenses. I hope he pays you within the next day or two. Don’t worry about being a nag. Be firm, clear and concise. “I need the $200 you owe me, please send it today.”

    I’d also start calling to see if you can get a refund on the ticket. Don’t threaten to get a refund unless you know you can get one (otherwise he might assume you’ll get the money back and be even less motivated to pay you). If you can get a refund then give him a deadline of a day or two with a warning that you’ll return the ticket if he doesn’t pay by your deadline.

  15. Tell him he needs to pay you back and get a firm date no longer than 2 weeks out(paycheck coverage). Half way though the period remind him that he will be paying you back on xx-xx-2022 date and then also once again the day before the date. On day of and towards the evening if he still hasn’t paid you then ask again one more time. Anything less than getting your money at that very point means you will never get it and to shitcan that turd of a human. block him, and cut off all contact because at that point he really doesn’t care about it.

  16. If you bought it, tell him to pay or you’ll cancel the ticket. You probably won’t get your money back but screw that guy.

    Tell him exactly what you said, “you just moved and need the money’.

    Give his am date and stick to it.

  17. Tell him the truth, or a variant, that you need the money due to unexpected moving costs.

    If he can’t afford the $200, split it into 2 payments of $100, but you need it before the trip. (I wouldn’t do more than 2, as he seems the type that would try to weasel out of the final payments, saying he paid it already.)

    Look at the ticket cancelation policy. Sometimes they are non refundable, but you can get a credit. If it looks like this loser wont pay you pack, I’d cancel the ticket. Better a credit, even for half the value, than this loser not paying you and sitting next to you on the plane and ruining your vacation.

    In the future, borrow/spend only what you can afford to lose. Sadly, these types of people are common and keep burning those bridges. I’m sure he’s done it to someone else before and will do it to someone else after.

  18. “Hey mate. With my move and all, I really need that $200 you owe me. I’ll be around on Friday for it.” If the money isn’t paid by or on Friday, end it.

  19. Put your foot down, tell him to pay you back by the end of the week or you sell the ticket on. He’s taking the piss in the hopes you’ll get fed up and stop asking him, that’s ruining the friendship, not you. He’s nearly 30 and can’t manage his finances, if you ever plan anything in the future don’t help him out, he needs to learn.

  20. See if you can get your money back for their ticket. Contact them and let them know if they don’t pay you for the ticket in 2 weeks you will have to cancel their ticket because you need the money.

    If they don’t pay you back or you can’t get your money back, see if you can sell the ticket online or another friend what to come along who is not a broke and bad friend.

    Never, ever offer to do anything money related for this person unless it’s a gift

  21. Life pro tip: never loan what you can’t afford to lose. I know it’s sucks your friend is a scumbag who won’t pay you back but this is a good time for you to learn this lesson.

    I honestly wouldn’t bother pestering him. If it’s been a month he has no intention of returning your money.

  22. Be really straight with him.

    ‘Look man, this is awkward but I need you to pay me back TODAY. I can’t afford to pay my rent without it and am getting hounded by my landlord. If there’s anything you’re not telling me as to why you haven’t paid yet, you need to be honest with me. I really need my money. Sorry don’t mean this to be awkward it’s just causing me problems! Hope you’re good’

  23. I had a co-worker ask if she could get paid early without her sister knowing, said sure just transferred from my account expecting the full amount back 4 days later…been 5 months. Sorry but you’ve reached full on time to be an asshole land.

  24. Can you just send him a request for the money on an app? I’ve found that’s often an easier way to recoup money because people have a physical reminder of it that doesn’t go away until they pay it.

  25. “Hey, I really need that cash, man. You got your phone on you? Yeah, just cashapp me real quick.”

    “I need that money. I don’t have much time left to get a refund for the ticket. You have until next week.”

  26. Don’t talk every day. Start tuning him out. When he feels you start drifting away he will most likely panic, then you can say – ‘hey let’s talk when we are financially squared away”

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