Saturday, April 1, 2023
HomeRelationship AdviceI think I’m moving on?

I think I’m moving on?

So I was with my ex for 5 years, long story short she lost interest, got into a rebound that failed after not even more than a month, was doing all this shady stuff leading to the breakup.

I was crushed, I had nobody to go to, I was practically homeless for the first month living out of bags desperately trying to find help.

However I improved I worked out got in amazing shape, started a bunch of hobbies, etc. but throughout the entire time I used to beg god for her to come back, when I saw her rebound I was angry and now any time I thought of her I got this overwhelming sense of fear like flight or fight.

I’ve since gained a decent following on TikTok showing off my big transformation and posting healing videos plus workout vids, funny NOW she is trying to find ways every other week to see me in person. Views my socials often and even likes some of my videos.

She just recently asked me for a favor (so I can see her in person) and at first I almost went through, I didn’t give her an exact day I’d come through so we’re both just kinda waiting. But I feel this strange sense of awareness. Like realizing my worth, and recognizing ALL the horrible things she did and said to me during the breakup. It’s been 5 days since she asked for me to stop by, I can’t lie a small part of me says eh let’s see what she’s gonna try to do, pretty silly excuse just to see me in person.

But a big part of me is just like nah not even worth your time you’re too busy anyways. And this is the first time in the entire breakup where I actually feel STRENGTH I don’t feel like a desperate puppy fantasizing over the what ifs.

Just wanted to share y’all I’m proud of myself for once!

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  1. Good for you! If she couldn’t respect you while you were in a relationship together, she’s not gonna respect you now. She’s realizing she fucked up hard.

    You will find someone who loves and respects you, but it’s definitely not her.

  2. If she’s asking for a favor, sounds like a test to see if you’re willing to do something for her. What that is, I don’t know. Do you want to find out? Know your worth. I’m sure you’ll know what to do.

  3. Don’t do it. Don’t meet up. You have come too far to go back into the past. That is where this relationship should be left at. In the past. Congratulations on working and improving yourself. Stay committed to yourself and what has brought you this far, brethren ✊️

  4. giving her the gift of missing you is very powerful. Moving on especially when we self improve, i.e working out and having a purpose and goal. once you give her the attention and validation she seeks, she’ll resort to her old ways.

    from one male to another, proud of you brother.

  5. Wow, this is literally exactly what I am going through. On week 2, been working out again since the start. She rebounded literally immediately. I on the other hand slept at friends houses for a week. Then I met a girl, we hit it off really well, unfortunately too well and I drove her off I think with being obsessed. My ex has not exactly tried coming back to me yet, and I don’t want her too.

    But if she does, it will be the finest of rejection. Keep your head up and realize your own self worth.

  6. Do you ever wonder if you were like this (the new and improved version of you) in the relationship, if things would have been the same? Was it ever worth it to begin with -or- would things have worked out better for both of you if you would have loved yourselves a little more during your relationship?

  7. Good for you don’t do it. I will say I was in a similar situation. However once they finally started to try and come back after I picked myself out of depression, I simply ghosted them. Feels good to have the ball in your court and them thinking of the what if’s. Cut her off and never look back.

  8. Congratulations OP I hope i’ll be like you soon. Its been a month since my ex gf left me. A week after our break she already found a man on Reddit. It hurts like hell till now but its now bearable compared to the first 2-3weeks.

    Exercise really helped on my mental health and hopefully soon i will see my worth. That she left me for someone else. That she trashed our 4yrs relationship which i would not do to the love of my life.

  9. The opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference. Keep on doing you, and don’t even bother with her. She’s in the past, so just leave her there. Congrats on your new found emotional freedom.

  10. good for u! i’m hoping i can get to this point, for me it’s been over a month now and i’m still wearing my ex’s tshirt most days when i’m at home and i just can’t get my brain to stop expecting her to text me. i have days where i feel like i’m starting to move on, then the next day will be spent in tears lol. it’s rough out here, good luck to u as u continue living ur damn life!!

  11. Would you like to share your TikTok I’d love to follow you, and good on you, BRAVO! I always respect people who make lemonade out of lemons. You obviously have a thoughtful personality. Meanwhile you are enjoying your achievements and the good feeling of being strong ,it’s good to remind yourself, stay humble and gentleman at all time.

  12. this is inspiring thank you, my ex said an incredibly fucked up thing to me yesterday & I think it was the final nail in the coffin for any moments of my indulging ‘what ifs’ etc. I still care about him but now just feel truly glad it’s over I think. Still in a bad place but maybe in a few weeks/months I can get there

  13. I feel your pain, was with mine much longer, I know/knew she was lying, and she continued to do so. It’s the Lust that got here ,when that wears off thankfully I will be 600 plus miles and an ocean away. Putting alot of distance between us.

  14. Don’t do it. Just don’t. Sounds like she realizes she fucked up. She’s seeing if you’ll still care about her despite everything that she did. If you give in then she’ll be emboldened and all this will happen again.

    Probably idk you guys that well.

  15. Whatever it is that she asks you for, agree but then just string her along; it will do you immeasurable good to see her twist in the wind a bit, watch her reach out in vain for something that she wants but can’t have. You deserve to know what that looks like from the other side.

  16. YASSS SO PROUD OF YOU!! My ex wanted me back too when I went through healing and was posting my adventures with friends online. If they didn’t love you at your lowest point, that was conditional love.

    It’s going to feel so good to turn her down lol

  17. Good for you! I’m proud of the progress you’ve made. Healing from a tough break up takes time and hindsight is often 20/20. Glad you’re recognizing you really don’t need her in your life to be happy and whole. Sounds like you’re doing so amazing.

  18. Letting a person who has mistreated you back into your life, is akin to a dog returning to eat it’s vomit.
    Keep on going forward, never go backwards when it concerns your own well being.

  19. Good for you! Your instincts are telling you not to touch this fire again. Your subconscious is telling you that if you got back together it would all just happen again.

    Be strong, take care of yourself, and congratulations!

  20. I support you cutting her off. I used to lie to myself and say ” I just wanna see what she’ll do”
    I was lying. I was just doing what she wanted..yeah I got to see what she would do but I was also just going along with her bullshit. She sees your worth now? Naw…she had that chance. Do you.

  21. Sounds like she knows exactly what she’s doing, and wants to test whether you’re still under the thumb and willing to jump through hoops for her. She’s just dangling the carrot to make herself feel powerful / desirable.

    Best thing you can do is just block her, don’t respond to any messages, and get on with your life. Leave her wondering “what if” for a change.

    It sounds like you’ve really got your shit together for the first time in a long time. Don’t de-value this positive mindset you have, and look after yourself. Sometimes you need to save yourself from yourself.

  22. Happy for you brother! A lot of guys underestimate the power in clean living and maintaining peak physique. It really opens our eyes and helps us maintain focus when we’re at top physical condition.

    Keep on keepin’ on. Continue your growth and you’ll be able to determine who is truthfully the right one for you.

    Stay strong

  23. The reality is if you’ve already gone down 10 miles of bad Road why the f*** would you turn around and expect it to be any easier keep pushing forward myself I’m not a workout person I like smoking pot and growing weed same kind of thing

  24. Good for you!! Continued success in your life transformation! You don’t need her. She would be toxic for you and undo all your gains. Best of luck!

  25. I’d message her – you know after everything that you said and did to me when we broke up, I just can’t see myself with you ever again. If you really need help with X, I know ralph/Fred/barney that could help you.

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