Thursday, March 23, 2023
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Just found out he was married

Hello, so I’ve been dating a guy for about 5 months now, we even called ourselves bf and gf, we only just recently had sex last weekend then my world came crashing down when I just happened to find out he was married .. he told me had two children but never mentioned his marriage. I confronted him, of course he said the normal things how he truly loves and cares about me and so on. I feel so stupid and embarrassed even tho I had no idea. I had sex with him under the guise that I was his gf, we went out in public on dates plenty of times, he showed me affection kissing me and being all over me I honestly thought this man was my bf. Of course I know it has to end I’m not stupid, but I’m soo hurt and sad about this and I have no other support to go to simply because I’m embarrassed to even open up to anyone about this. We did plenty of other things so me thinking he just wanted sex wasn’t in my mind at all. He claimed I was more than sex to him and that he cares about me…. I found out from lurking on Facebook but somehow he claims to think someone he knows told me which isn’t true but I didn’t tell him. I told him I couldn’t continue with a man that was married and even threatened to tell his wife and he didn’t care not one bit. I grew up in a home where my father constantly cheated on his wife so it’s personal for me because as a child I know how that takes the dads energy a way from his children. I feel so bad about myself and kind of worthless honestly

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  1. You should tell his wife what happen she needs to know. If you feel this betrayed imagine what she would feel. You didn’t know that he was married but you have a chance to make things right for her so that she doesn’t waste any more of her time. After that cut contact and bop on off and love your life the best you can.

  2. I’m so sorry this happened. The fault is on this loser guy, not you!

    And it happens more than we like to admit in society. There’s plenty of shitty men sleeping with women unknowingly. I think that’s just dating in the 21st century now.

    Anyway, break off all communication with the guy. And sorry again.

  3. I’m so sorry for this, is not your fault and you deserve someone very much better. It gonna hurts for some time but you’re gonna meet someone honest and good. If you can go to therapy, do it. Good luck and I’m so sorry.

  4. You are not worthless, you were deceived by a selfish man.

    Please take care of yourself and stop seeing this man.

    If you are up to it, maybe tell his wife.

    But remember to be kind to yourself, this is in no way your fault.

  5. It’s unfortunate, things happen. Some people will never be truthful. At least you found out after 5 months. As for informing his wife, it’s not your place. Revenge will not help you. Lick your wounds, dust yourself off and get up off the mat, life is waiting you. You’ll be smarter for the next time around. God bless you.

  6. This isn’t your fault, you were deceived by a disgusting selfish man. Its very hard to find out you’re the other woman, this happened to me too in my early twenties in a student town (so I wasn’t even considering there would be married men in the pubs there- certainly not at a drum and bass club at 12 at night- so the thought didn’t cross my mind), I started seeing a guy, he was driving us back to my apartment, he accidentally lifted the center console on his car and I saw his wedding band- i was absolutely FUMING, it ended right there and then obviously), I wish I could have found his wife and let her know what a dog she was married to.

  7. No one blames you for not knowing. With that being said you should always do research on a potential partner. You never know if they are married, child molestor, felons,etc. Take your health and safety serious.

    With that being said i’m sure this isn’t his first rodeo. I’d tell him wife. She deserves to know.

    If you feel bad can you imagine his wife?

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