Saturday, April 1, 2023
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My wife begged me not to divorce her, then I caught her cheating again

This is a followup to my last post:

It’s been almost 2 weeks since I confronted my wife about her cheating where she rightfully admitted to it and made promises never to speak with her tennis coach again. She begged for me not to file for divorce and given that I don’t exactly have time to deal with this, told her that I’m only giving her one last chance. Any more of this rubbish and this marriage is no longer!

During my last shift, I decided to give my wife a surprise bouquet. Although I would actually be back in Hong Kong on Saturday, I informed my wife that I would be back on Sunday. Imagine my shock when I came home on Saturday and I saw both my wife AND the tennis coach half naked in the living room. He even had one of my boxers on. I told him if he doesn’t gtfo, I’m shoving that tennis racket down his throat. He immediately ran out in shame, covering his face. Meanwhile my wife tried to gaslight me and scold me for being rude to the tennis coach. I immediately took my most important belongings and left. I’ll be staying at a hotel for the next few days and am in contact with my lawyers

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  1. Everything from it being the Tennis coach to OP having business in Hong Kong really makes this sound like a tv drama about an upper class British couple from the 80’s.

    If the wife ended up murdering the husband so she wouldn’t lose everything in the divorce, it would straight up episode of Colombo.

  2. Heaven forbid you are “rude” to the guy you just caught, literally with his pants down, in your own home, sleeping with your wife!! Similar thing was said to me by my soon-to-be-ex-wife. Guys were asking her out and she didn’t want to turn them down, so as not to be “rude” to them. Never mind how I felt?

    A quote from another post I read on here recently said it best: ‘Lawyer up, and we’ll see you at the gym’.

  3. >my wife tried to gaslight me and scold me for being rude to the tennis coach.

    How dare you be rude to the man she loves. You’re just a wallet to her right?

  4. It’s simple really, these types don’t change. Leave her and don’t look back. It will hurt a lot less now than if you stick around and let it keep happening. Might even resent yourself for staying if you do, knowing what you know now. Good luck

  5. OP Freeze your credit and change all your credit cards, remove your part of the money from the joint accounts and separte all your finances from hers ASAP. Also onlyncommunicate with her through written media and if is legal where you live, record every conversation you have with her.

    Tell all your family and friends about ir before she manages the marrative to paint you as some kind of abusive monster whot throw her to the arms of her savior tennis coach.

    Change your passwords everywhere from banks, cellphone bills to streaming services. Be ready for the worst since uou have already saw what kind of woman she is.

  6. Wtf did you leave. You kick her ass out with the tennis coach. She can stay with him or someone else. Then call her family to come pick up her shit with you recording so if any drama comes up your ass is covered.

  7. Well, in this case there’s no much more to say, take the advice of your lawyers, and mind if leaving your “nest” is not going to be a reason for her to demand you for abandoning home while denying cheating you, and get advantage from you, she seems like a snake, no moral at all, sorry!!

  8. “Anymore of this rubbish and this marriage is no longer!” doesn’t sound like anything a 40yo person would say. I know crazy things happen in this subreddit, but this whole thing is written so strangely, “meanwhile my wife tried to gaslight me and scold me for being rude to the tennis coach”, do you have examples of what she said, OP? “Took my most important belongings and left.” Why did you do this? Also, weren’t your bags already packed since you came into town? Why did you lie about the date you’d return? Is it so that you could catch her in the act? It doesn’t seem so when you say “imagine my shock when I came home on Saturday and I saw my wife AND tennis coach half naked in the living room.” OP, if this is real, then you already have enough advice for what to do next. But, regardless, look into therapy. Whether this is fake or not, you’re going to need it.
    Edit: I just read the tennis coach’s perspective post and you both write the same. So yeah…

  9. Obviously a fake story. But you should never take a woman back after cheating. Ever. It only makes her respect you less which is why she was cheating in the first place.

  10. Transfer money out of all accounts she has access to and cancel all credit cards she has on her (I don’t even need to ask if they are linked to your account or her’s).

    Save all the messages she sent you either gaslighting or apologizing to you. If you have security cameras, save any footage showing the coach coming over after you stopped the lessons. Essentially, any evidence that she cheated in case she tries to spin a different story such as that you are a cheater or abusive.

  11. Should have ended immidiatly, once you allowed that line to be crossed without consequences, she was going to disrespect you again.

    But stay strong brother, go to the gym, go work harder, refuse the pain and treason running your life. You’ll get back on your feet. Learn the red flags she teached you.

    I know this sounds WAY easier to write right now then the pain you’re experiencing. But move forward and get yourself an Eastern European girl(1-2% divorce rate, don’t do western girls 50%) from the money you’re going to make.

    Keep moving.

  12. I’m sorry this happened. Your wife turned it around on you ,(that’s crazy).

    Her behavior is selfish, entitled, deceitful, and shows zero empathy for you.

    This is an abusive relationship. Protect yourself.

    Expose the coach to his employer. Expose your wife to her family.

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